"Doo doo doo doo-ooh... Jump on it, jump on it..." I hummed as I waited for the rest of the gang to turn up at English class. A few months of English class had taught me only two things :
No. 1 - Petunia's real love was Kenneth Anderson and therefore, the supernatural.
No. 2 - Her opinions were ALWAYS right, if you have a different one, then you're wrong.
And so we put up with her - such torture...
There were a couple of extremely frustrating incidents though. One time, we were discussing the answers to a comprehension and someone came up with an answer that actually meant the same thing as the word in question. But would she give in? You wish!! She stuck staunchly to her answer, a scarily ravenous look in her eyes. In one class, she was holding a discussion on her favourite subject, the supernatural. She, surprisingly, allowed Sania to put forward an anecdote. When she finished, Petunia stared at her with an indifferent look on her face for a few moments and then said, "Well.. coming back to what I was saying..." Yes, we have given up on her.
And then, there were times when she would stroll in with a large black book that had "Kenneth Anderson - Volume 1" written on it in block letters, tucked safely under her arm. I still haven't figured out whether I was happy that she was not taking class or just plain angry that people were still printing that book!! Sanjana and I, of course, would come up with devious plans to thwart her evil designs - most of them consisted of burning the Kenneth Anderson books that she owned and sending her a note that said, "Ha ha HA!! In your face!!" But we had come up with delightful variations.
So, as I tried to keep myself occupied and keep my mind off my impending doom, I suddenly heard two voices talking about chocolate. Where I come from, only two people can hold a conversation about chocolate and make it look like they're debating on a an issue that can affect the world's future(if you don't try to hear what they're saying that is..) - Nika and Maya. They always reminded me of Fester and Cousin It from the Addam's Family - completely crazy and phenomenally weird. And also Maya looked like she was going to blow up in every photo of her.
Nika fell into the seat next to me and greeted me cheerfully. Maya followed suit and the two of them were back in their world of chocolate again. Sanjana walked sprightly down the aisle and sat on my right. "You look happy today. What's up?" I said, a little taken aback at the broad grin on her face that seemed to be growing with every minute. "We got our French papers," she said excitedly, "and I got 35 on 40!!!" "Yay..." I said distractedly. Petunia Casper had just walked in.
"Hey folks!" she said, as she dropped her register onto the table. An uneasy silece fell upon the class and a few cringed (including yours truly). Petunia looked around, a bright smile plastered on her face. She seemed blisfully ignorant of the unease. "So," she said, crossing her hands, "shall we start the listening comprehension today?" A chorus of groans rose from the class. Petunia gave us a raised eyebrow look and smugly said, "It's either that or a feminist perspective lecture." The response from the class was something of a shock for me.
Fervent nods and loud yeah's could be heard from almost every corner of the class. Petunia looked around, the shock evident on her face, too. "Well...um.. if that's what.. uh.. you want, alright," she stuttered. After a moment's hesitation, she turned towards the blackboard. "Psst.." I turned to my side. Nika leaned towards me and whispered, "I think she's still in shock!" I grinned at her.
Petunia turned around again. Her face seemed calmer now. Placing her hands on the back of her chair, she looked up and said, "Well, let's start then. Now, tell me, what is your idea of beauty?" A few phrases like "beautiful eyes" and "luscious hair" rose from the class. Not willing to be outdone, I raised my hand and smugly said, "Brains!" "No, no!" said Petunia, indignantly, "I'm sure that's not your idea of beauty!!" My mouth dropped open and all that came out was a confused "Eh?". I turned to Nika and asked, "She's kidding me, right?"Maya discretely covered her mouth to muffle her laughter. Sanjana seemed to have collapsed into fits of laughter while Nika, who was surprisingly calm, kept pointing out faults in Petunia's arguments. Me? I couldn't remember the rest of the lecture - I was still in shock!
